remind me next year to leave the 19 year old girl at home when you're going to pride. total cock block
Imagine if sharks could walk on land...scary.
She said she never had to courage to go fully shaved. Since when did shaving your snatch become courageous?
He just said "wow, thats some rly nice hair! And those teeth..thosee are some cool teeth"
I wish I could go about my daily activities with his dick inside me
apparently the bartender would rather give me free shots than tell me that my whole nipple piercing was hanging out
I don't know what you're talking about but its dick galore in the tub. We will be getting poked tonight. Bring forks.
I was looking at your puke while I was peeing in it the next morning and that ceasar salad did not treat you well
Dying on my bathroom floor at 7 am, I would rather be eaten by a shark right now
I've never seen an uncircumcised penis. I mean in person. I've clearly seen an uncircumcised penis. I have the google.
I tell you, MacGyver never had to put up with people shitting themselves while he worked...
The bros used their bong water as pong water but I walked in mid game and didn't know so they hit our first cup and I chugged it.
Have fun in Vegas! Be safe, use condoms, and take a pic of Jon beforehand to give out when he goes missing. It will help the police.
Ok, you agree to the terms? We can have sex, but this doesn't mean we're back together...it just means we're working on things. Got it? Sign here.
How in the fuck did you get LIVE MOTHER FUCKING BATS!?!?! Into my ROOM last night????
Randomize
