is it wrong to smoke out middle schoolers?
yes...dear jesus what did you do?
bwahaha. ask your little brother in about 20 minutes. im dropping him off.
i love that we sang a whole new world together while you carried me through campus
Nothing says Happy Thanksgiving like having to pee in a condom for my cousin so that he can pass a drug test.
Just found my DARE notebook from 6th grade. Extacy was starred and highlighted.
At least I've made one childhood dream come true
So i'm in a museum and theres a punch bowl from 1765 with a picture of 3 men forcing the 4th to drink the punch bowl. Colonial hazing
now I know why they wanted me to come. apparently gay guys are stripper magnets
And some old guy told me Jesus loves me and I laughed super hard and told him sinning is fun. Hahaha
Hypothetically, if a stripper with braces bites you on the cleavage and it leaves an open wound, do you need a tetanus shot?
Im otw to class. I was at the Library. Just past three girls with a bottle of tequila playing dizzy bat.
I'm thinking about slathering myself with peanut butter and going to the dog park. What's the worst that could happen?
moms trying to set me up with a 28 year old. hes graduated university like im getting high in my bed and he's an adult
I renamed some of my contacts in my phone before passing out and I have one I cant figure out, its "fucking house elf scum"
Woke up naked with a post-it that said "don't ask questions" on my ass...i know im not supposed to ask but uhm what did I do?
I feel like i'm being yelled at when you type in all caps.Did you just have bad sex?
It's official! Naked girl is back and making stir fry. Still not sure she realizes we can see her whole apartment from our balcony. Cheap beer and a show.
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