I never noticed this but I have a beauty mark on my labia minora
Please tell me how you discovered this.
I was looking in the mirror snooping around
you didnt say anything until i brought it up today. i guess i misjudged your maturity.
I guess I misjudged your gender.
He just spent five minutes trying to sling shot a cheese-it off his dick and into my mouth.
I love my penis, it thinks for me sometimes
i was so worried that when his hands were down my pants he was going to find the weed i stole from him
Nothing like throwing up 1/2 price appatizers and 2 4 1 personal pitcher in uniform to remind myself what a succesful failure I am
he said he has something really important to tell me but isn't ready yet. It's either that he loves me or has herpes
he has a puerto rico area code and says his name is johnny cash. extremely suspect
She broke up with him yesterday after she cheated on him. He's going a bachelor party next weekend. How has Homeland Security not raised the threat level?
These are your "grown up" slampiece's new hours of operation; please plan accordingly
Lesson: Never rollerskate with a 40 in your hand unless you have a destination.
We had a One Night Stand 6 months ago but he just Facebook invited me to his wedding. Who the fuck does that.
KY in my mouth and throat does not a party make.
You told me you were going to invite all of your Tinder matches to the same bar on the same night and make them compete for your affection in a series of Lust Olympics. Winner gets laid.
I am witnessing a blind guy whip ass at beer pong
Randomize
