some dude just recognized me causeg he had a pic of us making out onvhis phone
Godddamnit i jsu woke up in oharee. My connecxtion left an hro ago. Thosse flight atttendants can DRinK
he also called and said i only cheated on you 8 times but they were all trannies
and someone in the background yelling "one was fat so that counts as one and a half"
its 9am. i just got home. spent 6 hours blowing him in a closet last night
hey you sure the big one didn't have a penis she left the seat up
she fell through a window trying to flash someone
I just want to point out that nothing makes my hickie/hangover more obvious than sleeping in a scarf and sunglasses. nothing.
As i was blowing him Silent Night came on his iTunes. I said "it isn't christmas" and he moans "yeah it is."
She's drinking vodka out of a windex bottle. She is spraying it in her mouth and at strangers.
All I remember is intermittent flashes of being passed out on the side of the road 3 or 4 different times. And telling him to just leave me there and I would walk home in the morning.
Theyll love you, its bunch of older ladies who drink whisky and sours and talk about the sex seans in Game of Throwns
Metaphysical thesis on the illusion of self+ 2 day adderal binge = the walls of reality are crumbling
Do not, I repeat, DO NOT uncuff him no matter how much he begs. He knows what he did.
Two old ladies openly mocked me this morning at drunk breakfast. Is it time to reevaluate my life choices?
he just kept biting everyone and singing hilary duff songs. i can't even bring him to a gas station.
Randomize
