Soo....this goes on the list of odd coincidences. My gyno calls me while I'm going at it, leaves me a message. I check it later... thank God I tested negative.
Apparently I think casual Friday means I can show up unshaven in yesterday's clothes and reeking of booze.
For the record, a bath beer is far superior to a shower beer...
i just feel like it would be irresponsible for you to not have sex with me again.
My vagina agrees.
The sun is so bright. Whhyyyyy. EYES ARE DEAD.
Leave the bottle at home cause either way I'm not taking another shot. You have no idea how long it took me to compose this text free of grammatical error.
Gold star for you, but I'm on my way and the soco is buckled in next to me. This is happening.
Its a "sake bomb in the bathroom during class" kind of day.
You dont lie about slip and slides
Tid bit for you to add to your "what to expecting when you're expecting to lose your virginity" book... Sex on nyquil is cheaper and BETTER than sex on esctacy AND you sleep like a champ after so you're not able to think about any bad decisions made.
The guy at the Apple store said the warranty does NOT cover getting cum out of the keyboard. I can't believe I believed you.
Pavlovs bj experiment 2012. Welcome to the program.
I've got beer and a bag of saltwater taffy and croutons, is that enough for this typhoon thing?
You have to sext the same way you right a resume, you can only use active verbs
Her one night stand followed us to mass. This is too funny for real life.
Next time you decide to go downstairs hungover, please warn me. I now have to explain to twenty eight year olds why you were naked.
Randomize
