I want to do you till i cant cum anymore. Till all i get is a little flag that says "bang".
So Jesus turned water into wine. So what? I once turned a whole student loan into natty light. Your move holy man.
yeah, and then after the convo was clearly over, my dad decides to scream "SIZE MATTERS" just to make things even more uncomfortable.
I just can't bring boyfriends home.
I'm still reeling over the fact that you beat us all at Risk while you were flat on your ass drunk and falling asleep on South America.
Based on how hungover I feel today, it makes more sense that the bouncer didn't let me in to that bar.
you know...the drug dealer i named my baby after.
I'm really hoping to find some quality strange ass tonight while at my court appearance.
Well the "Blackout with your sack out" party turned out predictably.
I can't bring an entire liter in the bar in my purse. I mean I can. I might. I'm probably gonna.
I couldn't do it. You can't break up after that many orgasms. It's physically impossible.
well it can jab him in the chin so I am 100% sure he can suck his own dick
You looked at me, said I was a nice guy. Then you drunkenly climbed on top of me and said you liked me and wanted me.
Just cried because I'm out of oreos. This post-molly depression can go fuck itself.
I just wanna get high and take a fucking awesome nap. Those are my goals for the week.
Also I think I set a new personal record. Definitely slept with him less than 45 minutes after meeting him. Oh god my life.
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