I need like a "Cookong High for Idiots" book. Or a car.
Swear. I think after passing out in a community college parking lot I can safely nominate myself for the piece of shit of the year award
woke up in a garbage bag. literally. it was used as a sleeping bag.
Just made my alarm the Lion King song. Too excited about waking up to sleep.
driving around with you guys listening to the beach boys made me very concious of how white you all are.
just tried to puke while my RA was trying to puke in the stall next to me.bonded for life
Mistake of the day: loudly discussing my gay hookups on the phone at the dmv in upstate NY... this must be what leprosy feels like
I told him I was very thankful for what his country has done to my vagina and walked away.
I'm just chillin on the bathroom floor
Haha oh no
The bathroom floor is like my second bedroom on the weekends
Why is my vagina being sacrificed for yours? I'm sure he would take a piece of you too. Your turn.
Sweet! It'll be a "that-minor-I-used-to-serve-alcohol-to-is-no-longer-a-minor" party!!!
Learning to live poor pretty well. Cashed in all the coins in my car for nearly 60 bucks and yelled at a Pizza Hut manager, insisting I have a free pizza credit, until he just gave me a pizza.
I'm both gender and math confused
ALL I WANT IS SEMEN IN/ON/AROUND MY BODY. WHY IS HE MAKING THIS SO HARD.
I don't know..He walked out of your room with a kraft single..and blood on his shirt...He really wanted cheese.
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