oh and i feel obligated to inform you that there will be no sexin' because it's 'lady time' for me. so this ain't a booty call.
I know I hit you with my car but people express love in different ways. Everyone is different.
maybe if i keep dancing i won't throw up
Just saw a girl duct tape a cigarette back together..I feel like my life is shambles for being present for this
I said we should get a taxi and you were waving down cars, three of which were cops and one of them slowed down and shook his head then kept driving
He didn't think we needed a taxi
the girl peeing in the stall next to mine has really cute shoes. on a scale of 1 to restraining order, how weird would it be to compliment them from in here?
Hope you don't mind if I never tell my family about you.
Hindsight: Dressing up in nothing but a bra, booty shorts, and police tape made for the most awkward walk of shame of my life.
It's really not cool dreaming about going into labor with your ex boyfriends love child as you're sleeping next to him.
Packing a mid day bowl in the Sonic parking lot. Have I gone too stoner?
I haven't had to masterbate since I started dating him over a year ago. I don't even know if I remember how and my vagina is calling.
I just spent 5 minutes saying how beautiful you are and you come back with dont get fat cause you have weird nipples.
Well, at some point in her life every girl has to decide how much weird she's willing to tolerate for hot tall banker cock
you were angry and didn't have anything else to throw so you threw a breakfast burrito...?
I fell asleep giving a handjob, had a sex dream about giving a handjob, and woke up giving a handjob. Life.
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