We should be called the Road Head Warriors
i have it on good authority that she is not as good at giving head as she claims she is
dude,it's memorial day.not getting wasted=you're a terrorist
Im shirtless eating a burrito. How urgent is this?
He passed out on the floor and you kept hitting him in the dick and screaming "hammer of justice".
mary just dropped the yahtzee dice in her wine. and shes throwin em like shes on a craps table.
hahahaha slap the bag.
Fuck you, jack daniels. I feel like satan laid an egg in my brain.
He stopped replying so I told him I got tested and it came back positive for chlamydia to see if he replied. His phone magically works again!
Tell the cops to let you through! Tell them you need to do drugs!
She was way too drunk so I dropped her off at her house and smoked a huge blunt with her mom.
just once i'd like to actually BE there for your crazy drunk stories instead of just getting the play-by-play by people who can't remember half of it
He went down on me to the national anthem being sung by Jordan sparks. It was very patriotic of him
Sorry, that was mean and I didn't mean it. I'm just mad at condoms
I sit across from him at graduation so I get to stare at him and think about how I fucked his step brother and laugh to myself
Where am I? And why the fuck did you leave me here?
Relax. I left you somewhere safe plus you have all my weed so you know I will come back for you.
Randomize
