I'm home now. bring me food and boobies
somethin' about having sex in my parents bed makes me feel like l'm finally an adult.
cheating on your boyfriend is the best diet ever, I've barely eaten in days. The guilt is killing me
oh god all I remember is forward rolls down the corridor and all I have to show for it is "fit Romanian guy" saved in my phone
Sunday is a myth, I refuse to believe that I waste an entire day unable to function after a night of drinking.
There's something odd about buying beer for the first time while wearing my school sweater from kindergarten, but I don't mind.
Last time I heard from you, you were double fisting strawberry milk and wine. Answer this text so I know you're still alive. Bonus points for a coherent answer.
I just peed in a flower pot on the veranda while crying and holding a drink
He put crushed up bacon in the joint and now we're listening to the Matilda soundtrack I have no idea what's going on
So my dealer asked me if I wanted to join his circle because we smoked so much this summer he thinks we're dealing
I had to physically pry the rocks out of your hands so you wouldn't throw them at the guy with the cowboy hat. You probably would've missed anyways.
The bartender charged us for drinks. Life is different.
You tired to make us "vodka tacos". Which was just you dipping pitas in vodka.
Any good?
Well. FUCK YA. But that's beside the point
passed out in the hallway last night, now I'm sitting down in the shower, eating lukewarm canned soup out of Tupperware, listening to Carly rae jepsen.. I had a rough night.
Hold on, I'm taking nudes in a blanket fort right now
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