All I remember was yelling at him, "Its becasue of people like you that it took us so long to get to the moon!"
She used my dick as a microphone to sing "any way you want it" I'm in love.
You kept trying to hail an ambulance
dude all you wanted to do was sleep under a bridge
I just feel as thought we should spend the day in which we celebrate relationships the same as how we started them. Drunken hook ups.
Granted I did fall into a pond wearing your dress, but I did save a frog in the process so I think it was worth it.
She was wearing my robin hood hat from Halloween shouting "steal from the rich and give to the poor, mothafuckaaaaas." We are taking her everywhere.
I put chex mix in your purse for when you get hungry while doing your walk of shame tomorrow!
I want this pizza in and around my mouth forever..
I'll remember. Also, I owe you 200 for a pair of shoes that I carelessly bought to improve my spinal structure, to improve my health and ensure that I love to be 300 years old. Like Adam. Of the bible.
My vagina needs a break, I had to ice it with a beer bottle last night.
I just gotta say that I feel so much better now that I got some. I mean I feel like a normal functioning adult ready to contribute to society.
I made him watch the first 5 episodes of Game of Thrones before I decided to sleep with him.
I'm actually really happy I can say that my first body shot was out of a gay strippers massively ripped chest
I wore my old cheerleading uniform.. He came before I even touched his dick. Should I be irritated, or flattered?
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