I thidmdmk you'gre a special person
Ryan Reynolds porn could be a WMD. Have a giant TV on the front of your tank, and just drive around playing it. Everyone dies of orgasm overload.
That's it. Iraq is done. Everyone dies, game over man.
that's why i date skinny girls, they don't realize how small it is.
i signed up to donate 10 dollars a month to help the children that are being displaced in columbia because of the drug wars.. i felt obligated
I got to the apartment, I was handed a beer within 20 seconds, I'm glowing in the dark, there's fog everywhere, and now I'm wearing a sombrero because apparently it's silly hat night. I never want to leave.
He started telling people I was Stephen Hawking's son. When that didnt fly he switched to Tony Romo's cousin
God and karma are having a fucking field day with my body today.
What kind of a birthday party isn't a get drunk and ruin everything party
Come part with me. By you sleep! No fun. Idek feelings Sorry for your life.
It's really sad that I'm trying to calculate in my head the type of place to have dinner that's worth anal
STOP SETTING ME UP WITH GUYS YOU MEET ON CRAIGSLIST
You asked me what the point was. Told me your were dying alone and then had me take you and Wendy's where you bought 3 meals and ate them in about 10 minutes saying you didn't care if you got fat...
Judging by the progress I've made since I woke up (none) I'm thinking this hangover may keep me in bed.
i'm really sorry, but i'm just not sober enough to make good decisions.
He brought me a bottle of Jack, got me off 3 times, & then left. This is the best fakelationship ever!
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