The best thing happened. Some guy was butchering Conway Twitty at karoke and the power went off in the whole bar. And someone shouted "you pissed jesus off when you messed with conway!"
is the fantasy fufillment of sex in a hot tub worth the possible infection?
I'm not gonna not go for it, she's foreign and pulled a shotglass out of her thong.
We agreed to not shave eyebrows when someone is passed out. douchebag.
hey remember that 14 year old i met 5 years ago who i said i would bang 5 years from then?
Yup.
You know, I never expected to find myself with a roommate who I'd have to ask not to have sex while I'm in the room. And yet, here we are.
I think the guy in front of me just puked in a styrofoam cup.
Idea for the cake. Joints for candles. Do it.
Will it make you feel better if we wear the title of dysfunctional fucking roommates? It requires monogamy unless we want to bang someone together.
My dick pics could make it to the popular page on Instagram.
I just saw two homeless guys bond over the fact that they both use Crown Royal bags as wallets in Burger King.
He tried to get me to go back to his place on the condition that he has 6 cats. I was very tempted but I said no. Hoping to go see the cats tomorrow
It's hard picking what to wear when you know the plan is sex. Like can't I just wear my robe let's just simplify this.
Made it to my hair appointment on time, and got some dick. Today is already a great day
he's been 21 for 38 minutes and he's already trying to fist fight this dude over his girl
awwwww babys first drunken mistake
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