we went to a bar last night, drank beer in plastic cups. I took pics w/a random kid i pulled into a photobooth & i have easy mac in my purse. I belong here.
my mother just offered to pay for my fake id.
What kind of poor, pathetic town do we live in where a horny teenage girl is sitting in her basement on a saturday night, unlaid?
They live so far away from me that not fucking them both would have been financially irresponsible
I voted for him because his wife supports his raging sex life.
your friend did not want a bj. we need to leave. this is very awkward.
I just did a sobriety test in a tutu.
i wonder if cab drivers are trained in the art of delivering girls back to their dorms on Saturday mornings. because mine was so nice that he dropped me off at the back of my building so no one would see me.
I feel like I should have backed off when "I love you" came out on the third date. Now I'm in her bed wondering which door my shrine is behind. Fuck.
I made out with a dude last night who has an ex wife. Is this what post grad life is about?
Don't blame me. My vagina leads me astray.
I plan on blacking out and milking a cow
Ask him to BK for an ice cream cone and do him in the car. That counts as a date
I'm glad you don't care about kids. That's one of your better qualities.
I'm at work behind the bar and just washed my mouth out with rumple bc I don't have a toothbrush. This may be a new low.
Randomize