Best look from Detroit today: running across the street with your buttcheeks on display carrying a 40 oz. Or maybe being crazy-pregnant and screaming and slamming a pay phone. Toss up.
He wouldnt get hard, then started talking about his ex wife. I literally rolled over and started to cry
I had to fart so bad so i let it go hoping it would be quiet, it was loud and shit came out!!! and i couldnt leave because her parents were behind me
what is the aproppriate waiting time between having sex and playing super Mario brothers
6 min
I didn't think moms care packages could get better than greygoose, weed & double stuffed oreos, but she just snet me a chocolate bar full of mushrooms.
This guy just showed us his webbed feet to prove that his son was actually his son
Our Icelandic basketball player brought cocaine and rachael is screaming that he should do lines off her stomach. It's that kind of party
He was my shower sex Sherpa last night. And we both made it safely up the mountain.
He would drink pee if it was in a beer can
I lost the bet. I now have to do all chores sans clothing of any kind. I give it a week before I'm knocked up...
Why do I think he'd like to keep my hair in a box?
I only have one kid whom I wish to hit in the face with an active jackhammer. How's work?
Should I tell this TSA agent his fly is down while he is trying to hit on this chick?
I called you last night? What did I say??
That you love me forever and that I'm the greatest in the world now mohammed ali is dead...
I am so horny. It's like all the stress of finals week has relocated to my vagina.
Randomize
