don't you miss dr. quinn: medicine woman? i do.
i'm watching a show about a girl who died from masterbating with a carrot. A FUCKING CARROT, EMILY! YOU NEED TO BE CAREFUL!
I forgot how ruthlessly advertising works on me when I'm high.
saw a man at the beach in a red speedo. when he rolled over he unintentionally displayed a HUGE skid mark.
Yeah. Fortunately, the road to Hell is paved with naked 21 year old girls.
Which beats the fuck out of good intentions.
What ever happened to the whole 'innocent until proven guilty' thing. Like 'not pregnant until proven pregnant'. That's how it should be...
My way of showing team usa support, bronze: handy silver: bj gold: home run. God, I'm patriotic
He's so hot and there's so much R Kelly and vodka I think I might die.
LET US USE OUR GENITALS TO CELEBRATE THIS VICTORY
Just do it. I grew some lady balls and did it last year. It's your turn. Time to show what you're made of. Hit it or quit it.
Well after we were arrested you just kept chanting "Like a good neighbor state farm is there"
I'm so high. I'm going to need directions to get home.
I need to be her Aladdin, and show her the world. The sex world.
ah lol cocaine is strange when I dose I feel like an elephant running through a grocery store
I just had 3 numbers I don't know text me and remind me I am to attend AA on monday. Im gonna say it was a good night.
Randomize
