you lied vaginas dont taste like gold fish!
noo i said youre golden if her vagina tastes like fish!
Well, what part of "I've heard she has crabs" didn't you take into consideration?
Do 'mystery' cracked ribs heal any quicker than regular ones?
one of them held the wheel while the other one changed her pants. while driving. on the thruway. what
Stole a wheelchair from the hospital and rolled down the street smoking and drinking this is my weekend
well I think it'll pretty much be gone by Saturday. On a scale of 1- Snooki's unborn child how much do periods freak you out?
Let's be honest, your relationships fail because the man you're looking for is the equivalent of an intellectual blow-up doll.
We did a lot of coke and Bedazzled the couch. It seemed like a good idea at the time.
I thought that wasn't a thing ever since she showed you her vag on the dance floor
Some girl just walked passed me, said "fuck yeah!" and is now crawling up the stairs
Please tell me that I didn't call you to say I was swimming in outter space
I literally ate pizza on a toilet and made up reasons as to why you should make out with that boy. I am unstoppable.
Two grav bong hits and a shower later and I'm ready for company
It's like you say things that speak to my soul on a deep personal level
They have one of those claw machines here... with a dildo in it...
man do I wish I knew who this naked guy in my room was...
Randomize
