absolutely 100% incorrect. and i love you more you silk skinned goddess
Short Circuit remake moving forward, David Carradine dead by his own hand. Come home soon, society deteriorating rapidly. Nation's capitol likely not safe.
Ugh, here's a dating tip. Hairy legs are a major turn off
In attempts to Not be THAT GIRL in front of my new crush I will only drink a 12 pack instead of my normal case.
I didn't take her seriously until she snorted that ramen noodle flavor packet...
Just erased 'masturbate' from my mental To-Do list because I've got too much stuff to do. I hate adulthood
i found him! he's on the front porch using a bag of potting soil as a pillow. i forgot i left him there.
We fucked then made friendship bracelets, his mother taught him right!
He passed out in the car on the way to the party. Seabiscuit tripped before the race even started....Lil bitch....
where will you be at 9:30 tonight?
piledriving you in your roommate's bed?
Oh man. I am high, watching The Office and getting pancakes. What a country.
If you binge watch Bill Nye Saves the World without me you can consider yourself single
I probably would do him if given the chance but how awkward would Bible study be after that.
Thank you for dog sitting, there is $60 on my desk to be spent on DRUGS AND/OR GAS ONLY not that food stuff people crave.
FYI there's a girl here with happy daddy written on her tits
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