how do you clear previous safari searches on an iPhone? i asked my brother to google something for me and "big penis" "empire chinese food" and "reverse cowgirl" popped up.
remember the good old days of high school when a half gal would last for more than a nite
I intend to get homeless drunk
it was frightening. in my opinion the only thing that should resemble a vagina is a vagina.
every time i wear that dress i get kicked out of a bar.
just filed my taxes drunk as balls. i may be going to jail.
Why did the fire extinguisher taste lemony?
You should imdb "mourning wood" to see what I'm doing with my $80,000 English degree today
It's like bringing a chick home from the bar the night before and waking up to thinking you are about to go another round... Just to wake up and find she's already left...
Using a miniature baseball bat to kill a mosquito in the house may not have been the most efficient or safest way, but that thing is fucking dead. However, so are three wine glasses, a lamp, and my baseball bat privileges. Worth it.
I got drunk by myself and ended up listening to Beethoven in the dark.
Yeah probably not. I have a hair appt, a gun class, and hopefully a boy to fuck. I'm booked.
She climbed up the stairs with three brownies in one fist, two in the other, and one in her mouth. Also, she opened the bedroom door with her foot. I may be in love.
My dog just ran downstairs with my vibrator in her mouth... during my dad's birthday dinner.
The guy next to me on the bus has one hole in his jeans that has over 20 mini dicks drawn on his leg. Classic.
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