so all night Ive been that girl with her tits out @ the bar. I mean I dropped jaws, yo. But in a classy way.
so i'm just gonna leave my credit card in your mailbox so you can bail me outta jail.. deal?
We were sexting and then the radio announced robert pattinson would be playing kurt cobain in a movie and it totally killed the mood
Oh right she's pregnant - that's why all of her statuses have been uber depressing
I'm in the bar bathroom about to pass out. But it's ok cause I set my alarm to go off for last call.
being able to look good while almost puking is a skill that takes a lot of puking to develop.
I just discovered the Reese's pieces and sourdough bread sandwich. No signs of coming down.
This dude was wearing a "Plan B- One Step" backpack. I wonder how many more I have to buy until I get mine??
Frozen pudding on a popsicle stick. Bill Cosby would be so proud of drunk me.
Ummm Im the uneducated alcoholic of the group... if I say its a bad idea, its probably a bad idea.
I have family pictures in an hour and a half and I'm 9 beers deep. This is how I get written out of my grandparents will...
I mean really am I setting up a snapchat when I'm 40 so I can send nudes to my 23 yr old bf? yes, yes I am. Where is my life heading.
Hungover. No words. Just memes.
Giiirrrllll. Back to back snaps of dicks. Two different guys sent me their dick at the same time. This is totally what our founding fathers meant with life, liberty, and the pursuit of happiness.
Hungover on St. Patrick's Day. I did this backwards.
Randomize
