hitting rock bottom=girl fakes converting to christianity in order to get out of having sex with you.
I know now the amount of smoke it takes to set off the fire alarm....no longer worried about using the bong...not even close
these girls were driving down the road screaming "SHOT!!" out the windows and pelting potatoes at passerby.
i got hit in the ear.
I've never known a guy to fuck more random girls in the ass then Dom. His rectal kill ratio is at like 85%
He's like the Derek Jeter of Anal
That chick went from zero to shitshow in only 6 shots.
I dont even think your gonna like what I got you for christmas. If not we can take it back and get drugs.
I just smoked weed out of a baked potato.
You rock my world.
He tried to puke in the 14th hole and when I told him to stop he started chanting "hole in one hole in one"
Not remembering where I left my grinder before vacation #stonerproblems
Discovery: there is a folder in my pictures labeled "Your Name and cats"
we are not taking body shots with the irish cream
You may have gone on a date, but I ate chicken nuggets shaped like dinosaurs for dinner tonight. I think we both know who the real winner is here.
That's a beautiful sentiment.
Sorry about the Christmas balls dude. At the time I thought they were festive as fk but I see now I've just spent too much time on the internet
Ive completely stopped wearing makeup. Not even eyebrows. Thats how sick of wisconsin I am.
I no longer have the means to support both a women and an alcohol addiction
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