i'm so desperate for a drink right now i looked up the recipe to make pruno
I hope im prettier
yea, just so you know this whole self-loathing thing is getting pretty fucking annoying
he was dropping me off and i told him i had to go to the bathroom and i leaned into kiss him and he asked how i went to the bathroom with a tampon up there... he was amazed that their was a third hole...and wanted me to show him where it was
I have a new drinking limit. I'll stop when I know I'm going to untag the picture that was just taken of me.
she told me I give head better than a lesbian. I know it's a great compliment but it kind of threw me off.
I'm not throwing down for dinner because I plan to have so much tequila I puke it up anyways. How much is a cab home?
I would not be 19 again if you paid me. Guess who found naked pictures of themselves? Fuck cocaine
So... Apparently, "Home" isn't the correct response when a cop asks for your address...
I'm just learned what a rim job is, I feel like crying
I JUST DEFLATED MY BOOB.
I DON'T KNOW WHETHER TO LAUGH OR CALL AN AMBULANCE.
Almost just stuck my dick in my bong for no reason
In 2009 his now husband dressed in a sailor onesie and heels for pride so he needs to REMEMBER how to party
We have had more Sex in the past 48 hours then we have in the past 3 months. I think it was from me dressing up as Darth Vader.
MY LIFE IS HARD OK. I HAVE TO WAKE UP AT LIKE 10 OR 11 AFTER SMOKIG POT AND PLAYING FALLOUT UNTIL 3
You can’t judge a dick by its balls.
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