It was like a Michael Bay sized explosion located in my pussy.
you were grabbing cocks left and right
you literally grabbed sam's dick and said, "who's cock is this?!"
I'm so hungover that the internet is hard.
i sneezed during and he said it felt like i gave birth to his dick...then asked me to do it again.
I just withdrew $200 in ones. I think the teller knew what was up
Another one? Damn, how many David's is that?
six.
Oh, I thought it was higher.
No, that would be the Matt's
how do you say happy birthday to the guy that almost got you pregnant? i cant just write the same thing as last year.
Ok, let's play "if you were a slut" again and try and retrace our steps last night..
He was drinking hot tub water because i refused to get him a glass of water...
Believe me. As soon as the boss man is out the door. I am on my way to wow your vagina with my horse-like attributes.
I think the biggest problem with being overhigh is when the kitchen was on fire and I was pointing and laughing and eating rootbeer oreos like it was fucking Ozzfest 2000
whoa whoa whoa, you're saying I shouldn't post pics of you balls deep in a southern hottie?
I want your cock. I also want to cuddle you and tell you how amazing you are, because you know balance.
The last thing I remember is trying to chug the rest of the everclear, running through a fence, and laying down in the snow. I hurt.
So is he the one who got away?
They all got away. I’m a catch and release kind of girl.
Randomize
