So she stayed over last night and slept walked in to my moms room where she used the bathroom and then proceeded to get in bed with my moms naked boyfriend. So yeah, at least now my family got to meet her.
apparently vodka and oj turns green when you throw it up
basic color theory
I just had one of those moments where i was really sad that i'll never get to be asian.
I want to punch and suck your dick at the same time. I don't think we have the healthiest of relationships.
you were sleeping on the floor, then you woke up and told me you were not comfy enough. You took the carpet in the bathroom put it in the bath and you slept there.
Throwing up in the car while my mom drives, sister holds the bag & my dad holds my hair. This is how my family bonds.
I swear to God, if you drunkenly correct my grammar one more time, I'm cutting you off.
Male strippers are involved. You are coming
Oh god. Just tried to hail a pizza delivery car. Awkward.
International sake day = success
i'm sad to say... seems like women around here set up their armageddon booty calls ahead of time. wanna fill all these condoms with tequila and head downtown???
Btw I don't have words to express my appreciation at how many times you've had to be on a dirty bar bathroom floor for me in the past two weeks
The blow job award ceremony was a little much. You guys didn't need to call out what happened the night before.
What? How can you say that? You won!
I tried to cut you?! I'm sorry! PS where's my hair?
You kept pointing at me and saying I'm getting chicken parmesan and no one is going to stop me
Starting to realize that fucking everyone I come across isn't the most... "adult"... coping method.
Randomize
