Going to Kmart high is like jumping in a time machine back to the 80s
no.. I went home. Puking up hot dogs and lemon tart isn't as lovely as it sounds.
Dude I gave him a bj because he was upset about the NFL draft, if that doesn't lock it down, i don't know what does
what kind of roommate is she really? she wouldn't even hold my hair back.
Dude he's not responding... I'll take that as an unpleasant visit to the clinic
I have a broken liver
I see that the whole "let's take a break from drinking" has worked out really well for us.
Come to this bar
But I'm full of food.
MAKE ME FULL OF YOUR DICK
I don't want my liquor store dad to judge me...
But I made it seem like I wasn't hungover at work, so that's a plus.
I HAD TO PAY A COVER FOR THE FIRST TIME LAST NIGHT. My tits didn't get me in and I was so pissed.
And all i could do was bury the part of me that felt guilty for cradle robbing and put on my dick swallowing bib.
I still don’t believe you, the dog DID NOT tear down the shower curtain and shit on the floor.. we found you in the fetal position in the bathroom holding your tequila gun. It was you!
Car sex in a public place. Boo ya.
Did we go to Florida? My missing thong and DL just arrived in the mail. Return address was Tampa.
We met behind our asshole boss's back with the intent to oust him from the company. If this revolution is a success, bring nachoes.
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