Dude, Her having kids just means she puts out.
Angelique from Rock of Love is now doing phone sex commercials for central illinois....id say she's going places.
Some chick in the back of my Psychologhy of Addictions class just did a line off her hand. She tried to make it look subtle.
ASIANS HAVE SEX TOO!! I just watched it happen in the library.
My nipple rings set off the metal detector at the courthouse this morning.
new years resolution, not be in jail at midnight for 3rd year in a row.
I think it's our patriotic duty to get high and watch the state of the union tonight
my post shower fart this morning sounded like hulk ripping through a phonebook
Dude just pulled his dick out and started stroking it and making s sound like cocking a shotgun....wtf was in those e pills
I think it really helped to be hungover at accepted students day. it gave me a good feel for how it would be everyday if I go there.
My mom just asked me if I can obtain a fake ID by thursday
You know we have no secrets, right? I mean, you saw me shitting in a gift bag drunk and naked on Christmas eve.
I will most likely miss you the least and fondly remember you as Mr. "I need a minute" but really need 24 hours and 4 extra inches.
He hand fed me trail mix then I watched the video of me the next morning. He was actually feeding me meow mix.....that drunk. I still have no regrets marrying him
I'd say I was is in rare form last night but it's becoming pretty common.
Randomize
