And she was only 16?
You say that like it's a bad thing.
Dude, hurry and get over. I need a wingman. She is on her 6th vodka shot and her resident ugly friend is still sober
i just googled "alcohol delivery service". im combating drunk driving one lazy act a time.
this whole healthcare thing got me thinking.. without knowing it my parents are now going to be paying for my dealer to be able to live..
The dentist just giggled when he accidentally shot water across my face, I can sense how he treats women.
the guy was wearing a viagra shirt, i knew what i got myself into.
Was I shouting at a fire engine last Friday?
She just fell in the river. Meet us downstream with the bottle.
I wasn't that drunk, I know my limits. When peeing became difficult I stopped taking shots.
I was going to say I needed the exercise but now all I can think about is BJs
My work here is done
I'm ordering sushi and crying over finals. Come over and bring wine.
Just bought a dildo. Happy first time single in four years Valentine's Day to me
Im going to hell I gave him a handjob on the plane next, to an old guy playing video games on his iPad, on good friday.
Tune in tm morning for how to buy Plan B in a foreign country while coming down off ecstasy
This chick just walked out of the men's room with molly all over her nose and her shirt half unbuttoned. She nodded to all of us and said "gentlemen" as she exited
Randomize
