dude, that girl smelled worse than the great depression.
I just told this girl who bought a pregnancy test "good luck"
Drunk in a canoe getting pulled by a lawn mower thinking of you
not exactly restoring sanity, but he is throwing up on the national mall right now
I am way too high for this. Some guy just keeps talking about music and life goals and he apparently has lived in every city we mention we are going
I'm sorry I can't get drinks with you. I have to make sure my dad doesn't go to jail.
I don't know if I want to cry scream puke or go somewhere and drink more. This is such a weird emotion.
I AM HAVING A WEIRD OUT OF BODY EXPERIENCE. IN CAPS LOCK.
And i'll likely end up sleeping in a bush wrapped up in my poncho
I WAS KIDDING ABOUT SLUTEMBER BUT ITS ACTUALLY HAPPENING
He's driving 2 hours to visit me and he's bringing weed. I love him so much.
all im saying is 27 is too old to still be drinking 40s, you make more money than me, buy some decent shit
screw you you golddigging beer snob
One a scale of one to hella drunk, how gracefully can I make it down those stairs
Dear in laws. I am not spending any holidays with you. I dislike your company. A lot.
Im sitting on the floor of the hotel room eating nachos and drinking coffee. People should learn to embrace their hangovers
Randomize