Add "its too hot" to reasons why I don't get fucked anymore
So. Camera broke because I tried to wash it under the sink, kristi had to take me home and I woke up to my computer showing me that I googled how t take more than one shot at a time. I'd say the night was a success.
no you cant smoke seaweed
how did he go about obtaining bull sperm?
now that im off birth control, the world is a much scarier place
He passed out on the floor and you kept hitting him in the dick and screaming "hammer of justice".
So i do have strep. My apologies to the british guy from this weekend. You now have one more reason to hate america
She told me my pubes were as soft as "fine wool"
I CRIED after phone sex. Am I gay?
He had a tramp stamp of his own phone number. You can't tell me that isn't smart.
That's what you get for dating construction workers you meet in tunnels.
I distinctly remember holding up a piece of ham pizza and screaming: "WHO THE FUCK EATS HAM PIZZA" in the face of a bunch of scared 13 year old girls faces, while my own sister laughed in mine.
We were debating whether you had hooked up with him. I was right for the record.
I just spent my entire state tax return on sex toys
Yeah like stabbing myself through the eye with a coffee stir and bleeding out all over the office rug
Randomize
