Well, I'm a guy so I don't have one, but if its anything like the inside of my nose, yes, vodka would burn.
I would really like to get high with Bill Nye. I'm being dead serious. Every step I take is literally a step I take because it will take me closer to Science Guy high.
We could get him to build Inspector Gadget.
I didn't know you were high TOOOO!!!
i literally would have sex with every single person on this girls wall, but not her
mowing the lawn. still drunk. If my dad doesn't appreciate this I swear I'm dissowning everyone including him
I felt kinda bad after screaming 'ITS MY BIRTHDAY TOO' while he was having a seizure in the front of the party bus.
booty call hours are between 1:30-3:00 AM thurs-sat with the exception of major drinking holidays and election days. please try again
That's what you get for drunk dialing me to ask what kind of flowers I like while outside of a strip club, after telling me you "made it rain"
Dude she only counts as your gf if you're home. We both signed the fair game contract when we became roommate. So are you really going to be mad or come eat a waffle with us?
There's a treasure map on your stomach. Treasure may or may not be the clothes you lost...enjoy
Sorry we're taking so long, this weed cake tastes amazing with Tabasco sauce on it.
Yelling back at the people on Jerry springer through the TV, and eventually punching it. Failure of a night.
We can't tell anyone we fucked because I'm still trying to get with your friend. Is she coming next weekend?
I have better things to do with my life than be faithful.
Get the fuck back here. Your brother taped bottle rockets to the front of his scooter and is bombing around screaming, "Rest in peace, Goose!"
I woke up in my bed with candy and beer bottles all around me and i dont know where any of it came from. I love valentines day.
Randomize
