jackpot. dress really slutty so he knows you mean business
I woke up this AM and all of my clothes i wore last night are gone. Instead i am dressed in air jordans, boxers, cargo shorts, and an Affliction t-shirt. the part that upsets me most is that i was with a guy who wears Affliction t-shirts.
I will show your tits more attention than Michael Jackson's death.
there should be a national holiday dedicated to how high i am
i cleaned out my closet and found 7 beers from 2007. ive had 3 so far.
How the hell can the Olympic committee frown so much on weed and yet put on a show you would have to be high to actually enjoy?
You may or may not of thrown up on your shoes, and you tried to give me a wet willy in my eye.
She just admitted to me that she was a pinecone.
How was the party? Lets put it this way: "He wants her dick" was a factual sentence stated last night.
Everyone is now just referring to it as "the night Hannah couldn't get laid" so needless to say you didn't miss much
I yelled at the dude who smoked him up "YOU'RE THE REASON I'M NOT GETTING LAID" then went to bed. So yeah, I guess it was an ok night.
My last 2 google image searches were 'a lot of pudding' followed by 'a generous portion of pudding'
Nah, just stick him in a closet with some cheetos, a blunt and soda. The darkness will calm him down until Mallory can be located.
You took your pants and underwear off as soon as we got to Melissa's and just walked around the entire time like it was completely normal. We even ate pizza together with your vagina exposed. You're my hero.
If we both don't have awesome filthy sexual experiences to share in the morning...we are no longer best friends.
Randomize
