I got called a slut by a bunch of girls that work at Hooters..wtf is that shit? explain that to me
he started yelling "this is my pussy" mid thrust
ppl dont tell me stories about anal. apparently im not a tell-me-stories-about-anal kind of person
Is it standard protocol to defriend someone after they give you chlamydia?
I can't wait until next week, when I find out what drunk me added to the Netflix queue.
I guess at this point I should stop judging guys on their looks and more on their major and trust fund. Growing up sucks.
Sorry 4 leaving u in the dumpster last night
He came on my face. Threw a towel at me. Stole my weed. And left. I thought this would be over after we graduated?
I feel like I should be doing a victory lap around my house to the rocky music, or zapping and smiting people with my mystic wizard powers
Are you wearing clothes?
Fuck no, who do you think I am
So im waiting for someone at grand central and i look up AND THE ENTIRE BALCONY IS FILLED WITH BOY SCOUTS I AM TERRIFIED
I threw up in my room. And I cleaned it up with a spatula.
I could fuck to npr.
I'm pathetic. I'm eating cream puffs in the bath and crying a little.
Some guys phone started vibrating on the tv. I answered mine. That's how high I am.
Randomize
