we're at Rob's house and just invented the best drinking game ever....we are on Chatroulette and everytime we see a dick we all have to drink.
I know this is weird, but can you ask your girlfriend if she has my mailbox?
Seriously?
100%
It may be that your sole purpose in life is simply to serve as a warning to others..
Thank god i puked near the cancer center. makes me look like a chemo patient
I miss your penis. I'm telling you this as a friend, like its just a really great penis. You should be proud of it.
We made a bet that we had to talk like Yoda all night at the bars
I just mistook cooking oil for the whiskey that was also on the counter... They're the same colour. That was not a good shot... I need to not drink alone.
The upside of a losing football weekend is that there are more sad frat boys willing to let loose their inner gay man.
For future reference.... When you take a beer out of a 6pack... You don't insert your phone as a substitute.
So we became Pizza Strippers- we stripped and asked for slices of pizza in return.
Dude, I came home and you were passed out halfway through the front door in your Minnie Mouse outfit... with a beer still in hand
what better way to celebrate the birth of jesus christ than to get embarrassingly intoxicated and make poor decisions!?
I can't hang out with this penis. I'll start thinking I like the person it belongs to.
Walking actually physically hurts. We should do it again some time.
I accidentally sent my mom a nude picture of my ass... she replied with how did you get that angle ?
Randomize
