Ps there is totally a drug addled prostitute in olympic pizza asking for change for a 100 bill
Ok so the guy below me is either having sex very loudly or is very lonely
The bathroom is trashed. Someone took down all the rings of the shower curtain and Scott threw up on the curtain liner. All the soap and shampoo is in the guest bedroom and the lightbulbs are in a drawer. And there are vom footprints.
You'd think me telling him that I'm a lesbian would make him realize that I don't want to hook up with him.
at last call she tried to get the bartender to fill her flask. when he refused, i had to stop her from trying to pour the rest of her beer in there.
You should see the damage i did to the apartment last night. So many broken things and butter sticks stuck to windows.No memorys
With any luck I will spend the duration of this flight with my tray table up my seatbelt securely fastened and my face in his lap
I think I'm about to have sex with a second person before noon hehehhe! You're welcome America.
It's 4:30 AM and I just walked through a line of 10 deer without them freaking out. I am the campus deer king.
Yes but I said "let's get a dog" not a drunk human so some rules will be established this evening
Got so drunk last night I kinda sent a super on point sext to his kid sister...say a prayer man
She was giving me head, and a cop pulled up next to us. I freaked when he looked over at me, but so did he and rear ended the car in front of him.
CyberMonday=Bulk Condom Shopping For 2018
The girl at the liquor store remembered me as "the girl who pays in hundreds" so she didn't ID me
The neighbors ahemed the WHOLE time. Their kids are the ones that scream loud enough for me to remember my birth control. It's payback!
Randomize