yeah, but that could mean anything in Denmark.
You know its bad when you can over hear the planned parenthood nurses talking shit behind your back... they've seen everything
Almost thought it was a good idea to call his parents to thank them for having a son with an awesome dick. That high.
You told me to pour the Gatorade on you "like Flashdance"
Also, hurry up because I don't like drinking alone. I'm still doing it, but I don't like it.
I know this is really fun but I don't wanna glow anymore
Your car is in front of my house. Keys are in the mailbox. There is a fire hydrant in your trunk. Happy Birthday
How was the birthday sex?
Shit got outta hand. Honestly I think even my STDs have STDs.
I found you in the bathroom. You were sitting cross-legged on the floor wearing nothing but socks completely surrounded by broken crayons.
That moment when you see yourself in a security camera feed and realize you forgot a bra. And pants.
He? As in you personified your dick?
I left my ice cream out over night, it's melted, fuck this, I just poured Bailey's in it. Problems solved.
We are the rockettes of vaginal bleeding
I realize that my conversation topics seem to only be about bees and my cross dressing fiance. Thank you for being my friend.
Ok, you agree to the terms? We can have sex, but this doesn't mean we're back together...it just means we're working on things. Got it? Sign here.
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