i feel like when youre not in my profile picture no one knows who i am.
UD be completely fine. you don't lose control just keep a positive environment. for example i really want to lick the wall cause red is delicious but i don't have to.
i fucked her mom dude
there's something to tell the kids
Do you understand how much easier life would be if fannypacks were normal
i got her number while she was sitting next to her boyfriend. her actual number. i might be a superhero
Nope. Too hot. We just sat in my tub with cold water spraying on us drinking coronas. This summer heat is killing my libido slowly
He took the Gold in Olympic clit licking last night. Canada should be proud.
want me to make you a grilled cheese? I can't guarantee it'll be as good as yours but i'll go down on you afterwards if you want
brb printing out this text and putting it on my bedroom wall
We ended up on their roof with our pants around our ankles shotgunning beers at one point.
There is a severe lack of banging on that itinerary... I'd like a revision on my desk within the hour
I've got a bottle of water, a bag of salad greens, and a bottle of hot sauce. How stoned do you think I am?
woke up this morning and she was gone. but she left a box of donuts on the counter with a note saying "for all the 'o's you gave me last night"
there were rolls with just one bite out of each one leading to the bedroom. you were laying on the bed naked and yelled 'you did it you followed the bread crumbs!'
had more orgasms than hours of sleep last night
Looking back at our past texts, the minute it turned 2020 you were cleaning your house and I was dying of the cold. We were prophesying the Rona.
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