I think we should urban dictionary "drive of shame." It involves a sprint to your car in his underwear and shirt, surreptitiously trying to put on your bra on at stoplights without attracting attention from neighboring cars, and lurking in your car a block from home so you can know when your roommate leaves for work.
"Tuesday" and "open-bar" shouldn't be used in the same sentence.
How's work?
Spinning.
It's an "im going to have to shit with the lights off" type of morning
One day. I will touch his hair. I'm curious if it'll be like a soft cloud.
This coke is making my nose hairs dance. That good.
That's the kind of activity you can only get away with by wearing a lion codpiece
Literally this kid just told me he's not planning to live past 30. Then he hit himself with a frying pan.
Is it possible to be drunk burnt? Like sun burnt but from drinking? Cus I think I that's what it feels like
Just told my shrink " this was a year for whoring around"
Can we go one day without you telling me that your dick misses me
there was so much lube in my brother's closet...
that is very illegal...i love you.
If he ever pulls my hair again, I'm going to conveniently have lock jaw. Then he can decide whether pain during sex is still fucking appealing.
Now I am free. And I want to go meet men. My phone deleted all my contacts, and I consider this to be a new beginning. With a new man in my phone book.
Randomize
