So I fucked an Aussie broad with huge feeders last nite 2x... Before banging her she was blowin me & I thought: "SHE IS GOIN DOWN-UNDER ON ME". Laughed out loud
he only lasted three minutes, so to spite him i stayed the night and slept in.
I just fell asleep with a sandwich in my mouth at Cosi..people definitely saw
just found out there is no tactful way to ask your girlfriend to wax her stache. no matter what a google search would have you believe.
do you ever lay in the bath and watch the blood hit the water?
EWW. Don't discuss your period with me. You can go shave your back now.
So are you the girl that gave me herpes? or was that the girl from the night before
the line at the liquor store is out the door, and students in line are high-fiving like crazy...i love college snow days
Blood drive hookups: you will probably faint during the sex, but at least you know neither of you has AIDS
is it consensual if they're cheered on by a room filled with 30 people?
I woke up next to her will a oven mit taped to my cock. Dear god, I might have tried to use it as a condom.
I'm still not completely convinced I'm not pregnant. I just dipped beef jerky in cream cheese frosting.
Thanks for bringing me tea/a bucket. You have earned yourself a face touch.
I wouldn't know what to do. You never really mentally prepare for a cactus getting thrown at your face.
First she snuck beer into the movies and then proceded to give me a handjob in the dark theatre. I think I'm in love
You'll probably laugh but I am currently in bed in the fetal position wrapped in only my ninja turtles towel. Save me.
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