when people say theyve been sober for however many years is that like couple beers not drunk sober, or no drinking sober?
Its the Friday before break. There are 20 kids in my 300 person lecture hall. All with the same what the fuck am I doing here look on there face.
I don't know if it was the room or her, but as soon as the pants came off, it smelt like a locker room and old man farts.
Currently coming up with judgment, the game. Works well on buses, will probably be more entertaining in bars.
Do you ever feel like your dog agrees with you? Like REALLY really agrees.
She dresses cool and she's mean. And she has fake boobs I feel like I can relate to her on so many levels.
Thank you for FINALLY joining the Slutasorus Rex club in this conversation.
We had sex on a lawn chair while fireworks were going off last night. It was unavoidable that I got mosquito bites all over my ass
He took initiative. Dragged me into the kitchen and did me on the stove....while it was on! And then we made nachos.
I just wish my penis was a person so I could give him a high five.
It's like she fell out of an MTV reality show and no one knows how to send her back
Yeah I mean subtle isn't how I'd describe your flirtation strategy last night
cmon you know I'm perfectly capable of something that ridiculous 100% sober
She walked into the kitchen, said 'we've come to this time of the party,' reached into the bowl of cold spaghetti and shoved a handful in her mouth.
i need something from you. video yourself doing naked jumping jacks and send it to me. it will make me smile
Randomize
