Got a plan. Ill do rock paper scissors and if you win we smoke a joint. Throw rock.
This is a mass text. Does anyone know where I am?
sometimes I tug on my anal hairs for pleasure
you've officially gone too far. we are no longer friends
we better have passed that bar exam - i dont want to have to drink like this again
Started with us just having a beer. Now Ivan lit a torch to walk to the store, Ben smashed a 26 in the parking lot, and they're throwing broken shot glasses. Fratio Friday is something.
I just hit the bong during the whole bday song then blew the candles out with my exhale.
I was tied up in bed before noon, the rest of the day can go to hell.
I don't want to die alone with cake watching shows about cake
I've decided that my night was probably over when I started eating the penne vodka with my hands.
I'm so sick
I would imagine. You did most of your drinking for brazil last night.
That and I think I got food poisoning from sharing nachos with that homeless guy..
I can't straight up say the only reason I smoked a couple bowls with you was for your three legged cat
We both got free alcohol and got laid by foreign men last night.
I'm not going out again for the rest of my life. I can't top this.
I haven't taken a solid shit in four weeks. Do you know what started four weeks ago? Alcohol and dining hall food. Fucking college.
Nothing says "Hello, Adulthood!" quite like receiving a dick photo at 11AM from a guy you haven't heard from since fifth grade.
You know more about his cock specs than his childhood. Proud of you
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