it's my fault, I passed out instead of getting up to pee.
He quoted an N'sync song to confess his attraction to me. Needless to say, I had sex with him.
i soberly give you permission to do that to me when im drunk
so sad. i just ate the last good 'n' plenty out of the bottom of my purse.
My wife googled 'purchase vibrator.' Not sure if I should be excited or offended.
130 PACKAGES of glow sticks! The going rate of a rave is $38.30! GET READY FOR THE GLORGY!!!!!!!!!!!!
hand jobs are a waste of time that only lead to arm cramps. Also, where do you look...his eyes, at the penis, at the tv?
yeah the "where to look" question is super awkward
So I just had breakfast and then sex in a parking garage before he went to school and thus I am loving my life
When he was going down on me I referred to him as "Lord Snow" and HE GOT IT. HE GOT THE GAME OF THRONES REFERENCE. I AM IN LOVE
I've decided that it's a bad thing. But I've also decided that I don't give a fuck.
We are such grown women, dealing with life's problems one shower beer and reckless makeout session at a time.
If you sleep with him I will stab you int the uterus with a pitchfork.
Prepare the pitchfork.
Lets just say the phase, What a dick, has a whole new meaning at the urinals.
I successfully cockblocked 5 people in one night. I wasnt getting any, why should they.
On the plus side, he ate me out and gave me an orgasm. But he also talked about robots during sex and mispronounced it like the dad in the goldbergs and called them “robits”
Randomize