he said i was weird because i want to have sex in public places.
i dont think thats weird i think thats fun
i forgot to tell you, he fell asleep outside my house again last night, but im weird
Just realized our kids will one day call us old because we were around when texting came about. I'm sad.
Its already bleeding so dont be alarmed after you bite it
she just made some guy spank her... then made some chick take a running start and spank her.
I WALKED myself out of breath. And I'm lost I'm a Tim Hortons parking lot. That's how hungover I am.
you better take a shot tonight for every cat you have ever seen and wanted. this is a lot of cats.
I would compare it to a jeffrey but in smoothie form. More drugs in here than Bobby Brown's sock drawer.
I haven't received a dick pic from him lately. He's not even my boyfriend and I'm concerned. I hope he's alright.
I asked him to explain what he meant by "hooking up" in paragraph form
Ok well i was gonna say you can only borrow my fog machine if you will use it to emerge from your room in a cloud of smoke after having sex with sarah, so yeah we're good
I would eat the Denny's grand slam special out of my new probation officers b hole
They had an Olympic theme party at her work yesterday. She brought home her fake gold medal and hung it on my cock after she rode me.
You kept flirting with some guy while I was throwing up on the sidewalk, and I screamed YOU DON'T LIKE MEN
i just used a selfie stick to take an ass pic. i hate myself.
My friends say stay away from him but it’s still 2017 so I’m allowed to make shit decisions until midnight hahah
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