this kid just came up to me and asked me if i wanted to play truth or aids with him and his friends. i'm in
he said i was weird because i want to have sex in public places.
i dont think thats weird i think thats fun
i forgot to tell you, he fell asleep outside my house again last night, but im weird
who's fault is it that she tells me today she is only 16 because i definately met her at the bar...
No, I left myself a half eaten cucumber and a beer next to my head, pointed at it and said 'you're breakfast' and then passed out.
I just saw that cheerleader from u of arkansas that I hooked up with over spring break on espn. My parents would be so proud.
I've decided I'm gonna attack people with the toilet plunger.
Target doesn't accept your signature for your credit card if you draw a dick on the pad. Even of your name is Richard.
I liked a picture of him with his pants around his ankles, if that doesn't say I'm into you, I don't know what does.
It's a gay bachelor party, it's not like dignity is to be expected
Sometimes you've gotta crawl to stay concious
I just woke up on my neighbors floor with my boots on, but no pants. I have 3 separate taco bell receipts in my pocket.
Sex to movie scores is my best choice of the year. You've had an orgasm but have you had an orgasm with an entire orchestra.
Just cuz I'm recovering alcoholic does NOT make me the taxi for you every weekend
I'm classy like audry Hepburn. Chugging wine out of the bottle on the way to the club. Shed do that. I know she would.
So I realize somewhere between mildly irritated and outright belligerently pissed is where you are, but as to location, where are you?
Randomize