your thong is hanging out like whoa
my boyfriend just named your boyfriend's penis.
You can't have hate sex in a hallway!!
Then all the boys were saying that they were amazed at how much i could smoke...i'm so proud of myself
she said she could "feel the heat of my groin" against her. ruined the whole fucking moment.
If Andre Agassi did Crystal Meth, what was John McEnroe doing?
dude we gotta go shopping. I made pancakes this afternoon and used them as sandwich bread.
When I realized it was a dog, and I still had a boner, it was awkward.
Just drive me around campus, I will be able to smell their innocence.
idk. I was on the deck with Dominic and i felt something weird on my arm. I looked down and you were licking my elbow.
Mike is so stoned. I just heard him quietly mutter to himself "rock a piss" as he walked down the hall to the bathroom
Crowning achievement. I bought ranch dressing and emergency contraception.
SOS... STANDING IN THE BAR NEXT TO MY BF AND THE GUY WHO I HOOKED UP WITH ON CHRISTMAS DAY..
...okay, you can't just say 'masturbating llama' and not explain yourself
i just wanted have a romantic star gaze moment with him. untill he let out a massive fart.
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