i spent my evening searching "the sims having sex" on youtube
we're no longer friends
I wish there was a non-hangover washing machine that I could stick myself in right now
I just found out you can file for divorce online. I love America.
I miss seeing your mom and dad at church, well mostly just your mom... She used to hug my face into her boobs.
The guy I fucked last night is well worth up the ass tuition. I just wish I could tell dad thanks!
Just for future reference: milk is NOT a good mixer no matter how drunk you are.
He sent a pic, I sent one back. Then nothing. It's like we sext-messaged goodbye and ended the relationship.
Me+graduation party+hammered drunk+polish horseshoes in the dark= black eye, crying, pissed, passed out in my dress... How was your weekend?
and yes i will spend 10 dollars on a vibrating toothbrush to masturbate but not a calculator for my test
Lol I just left. He's funny and he's cute. Downside: he thinks he can outdrink us
I was high and he had on a gorilla suit. Of course I had to take a picture with him
Your a disgrace to smokers everywhere
did the fire alarm go off at the party last night I kind of remember a fire alarm noise
omg omg i ripped it out of the ceiling omg
Pretty sure my idea of standards went out the window when I hooked up with a guy who had a rooster tattoo with an arrow pointing down to his no no bits. Think about it.
I made out with about ten people last night. And four of them were just on the way to my car from the bar. And one was my roommate.
i cant go to his party cause last time i pressed the red buttons on the wall and the fire alarm went off for 40 minutes, i'm not allowed back there
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