talk about how much treatments for your hpv hurts
I'm going to appeal my grade. Is it better to look studious or slutty?
I feel like I had eight dicks in my mouth
i'm pregaming while finishing a paper on cardio myocyte contractility in mice. i'm kicking finals week's ass right now
As I sit on the toilet at 4 am I realize tonight could have gone a lot better
My underwear said "hard to get" on the butt. He laughed when he took them off.
This isn't just a hangover. I can feel the blood moving through my veins, and it hurts.
He offered to take my unemployed self out for drinks, but I really just want him to buy me the Beyoncé album
i tried to propose to him with my nipple ring but i couldnt figure out how to take it out
I decided taking Molly and seeing Birdman seemed like a wise life choice.
If I had an Australian accent I'd be unstoppable. Teach me how you talk
I just want you to make me second guess my worth as a human. Is that too much to ask?
You know I base where I go on the likelihood of me getting laid there. This includes work.
It was funny for a while but 3 days later I still can't walk and I've constructed a diaper-like contraption to hold the ice pack on my vagina.
Mimosas make me so tired. I just ordered a huge thing of pasta and gonna eat it in my underwear like a bad bitch
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