the chick doesn't look like she's put anything in her mouth for weeks other than his dick.
The producers of Marley and Me owe me about $5 million. That's the dollar amount of embarrassment compensation required for making a 24-year-old male cry publicly on an airplane while sitting in the middle seat between a gorgeous babe and a guy with a do-rag
Just turned elections for the sorority into a drinking game. Right on.
quitting drinking is the number 5 new years resolution but number 4 is enjoying life more which one do you think im going to pick
I just got fire extinguished by his roommate while we were having sex. That's just taking cock blocking to a whole new level.
it was like fucking gandolphs beard
After we finished he asked if I knew if it was a boy or girl. Diet. Starts. Now.
He was wearing his Class of 2007 shirt so I sat there for 5 minutes and read all the names of the guys I can remember giving head to.
you are not perverted enough for this relationship to work out.
I hope in my next life I'm a sterile trophy wife. With a husband who showers me in wealth and gifts but can't get a hard on. Do you think my karma is good enough for that?
Hmmm. I never knew the difference. I've done either one and had stronger or weaker versions but usually if i took enough, i tripped balls. That should be a PSA for kids... if you take drugs and the drugs are weak, just take more drugs... The More You Know
Idk she didn't seem that weird to me but I had just eaten an entire tray of jello infused with liquor so I could be wrong...
I think my body knows it's dying and is just shutting down
You are cordially invited to the annual finals week stress relief drinking binge at our manor this evening
They weren't kidding when they said "Go Army Strong." Best sex I ever had.
Randomize
