oh god the rape fog is back!
see... this is why i put birth control in all my friends drinks
wait.... you do what?
i used baking grease as lip gloss
Fuck now we have to have sex
What?
In a bet, need to win
Dude... Hand job in the lake... It was as weird as it sounds.
Should I mail that cop his nightstick or just throw it away?
I don't think going to Relay for Life and painting our faces while everyone stares at us is a sufficent late night after the bars.
Just saw a homeless man taking a shower in someone's sprinkler system....
This lumberjack with a huge beard is doing his group presentation in a dirty t shirt that says "I'm only 2 girls short of a threesome"
Who says there aren't gentlemen anymore? My one night stand warmed up my car for me
Omg you can't vacuum salsa that's just ridiculous
Still pimpin that dick in the cornfields. Now it's just transferred to the local bar.
I feel as if some line has been crossed, but only in this vague, WTF sort of way.
I woke up with an eye patch on, someone else's sweatshirt on, and no pants on. I hope it was a good night.
I don’t know how to sext. What do you say? What do you don’t say?
Just start quoting WAP lyrics.
Randomize
