i want to give my vagina back to god and say no thank you
You got off, kissed my dick and whispered "stay hard" to it, puked and then got right back on top of me like nothing happened...
I woke up at 3am naked and stroking a watermelon.
Just looking for some anal play. An attempting to read atonement. The highbrow/lowbrow divide is striking.
then you gave the doctors and nurses bloody high fives
He is so amazingly handsome. I just wanna fuck every shred of decency out of him.
HE'S EATING THE CONFETTI. STOP HIM NOW.
I smell like lime and condoms and I really want a waffle. Fuk
He's two decades older than you. Remember how you said you wish you lived in the 70s? HE DID.
I'm drunk still and I cried and now I'm watching Whitney Houston singing the national anthem and I'm crying more
If I take one more surprise finger up the ass this week there will be hell to pay.
Also, asking the guy who just told you he is crippled on edibles to watch your kid is probably frowned upon by most
I may or may not have spent student loan money on a vibrator, that falls under living expenses right?
Every day I wake up and there is no spectacular morning wood waiting for me I get so sad.
there is another microwave in the elevator.
Randomize
