If only Ben were 51% gay instead of 49%
ur penis kinda felt like a vagina to me
he walked in on you at the party drunkenly dancing alone on the bed wearing mardi gras beads, sunglasses, and using one ski pole as a microphone.... and you STILL got laid. i dont get your life.
Just violated the laws of fuck-buddyship and talked to him about my personal life. I don't like it.
On a scale of one to everyone dying I say let's aim for a 7
full cup flip cup was not exactly the reason I wanted to tell the cops when I was sleeping on the curb
What if our hands were octopus tentacles?
You're an idiot.
pro-tip: weed infused snickerdoodles are far less conspicuous to eat at work than brownies. no one ever suspects the snickerdoodle.
I'm considering having a threesome with my friend just so I can sleep with his boyfriend and not feel guilty about it.
I'm sort of afraid for my life tho. If the 4th of July can be the way it was a DMX show is capable of anything
we had a "who's sex playlist is better?" fight.....
You took one look at him and said "let's hope I don't remember this tomorrow" then you took another shot and chased it with a beer.. I guess it was a success.
Oh hello Jordan's parents, I'm here to have sex with your son. He's in the shower? Oh great, I'll join him
Woke up from a black out in a strangers Jeep without phone, shoes, or wallet.
I'm going to blackout. I realize this
Randomize
