What a fucking waste of an outfit
Her gay brother kept hitting on me and cockblocking me. Don't even begin to tell me how bad your night was.
He still lectured me about forgetting shit. Than he said he's gonna paint me green so I can stand in a corner and be a plant.
we're stoned watching those roller coaster simulators w our hands up screaming on our couch
Have your arms or hands ever gone numb after drinking too much?
Wtf did you do last night?
Dude I am not desperate enough to pay my dealer in change. Maybe tomorrow.
We can get high as fuck when there are no orders. If not its cool. I just figured Take Your Blunt Buddy To Work Day.
You're an idiot. I have LIVED as a cautionary tale of what happens when you drink too much and stick your dick in crazy, HAVE YOU LEARNED NOTHING?
So here's my pathetic thought of the day: what does it smell like to be sober?
He says we're "annoying" but that's an odd word to describe a couple of heroic liquor saiyans
His friend still there? Be like "I need to see both of your dicks ASAP"
I'll be home soonish I need 4th of July sex, it's the American thing to do.
She just started crying. With my dick still inside her. Something about her grandpa.
That butt dial turned into a booty call.
btw...it's noon and i'm sitting here drinking wine and eating pixie stix. I really need to find something to do...
Randomize
