This ginger kid smells like a queef popsicle
And God said, "Let there be Twilight," and it was so.
I should injure you considerably.
Actions speak louder than words. Her actions scream crazy.
rubbing her clit was like playing thumb war
I just wiped my vajayjay with snow. Bad idea.
I just smoked my last bit of kief with a grill lighter. This is what crackheads must feel like.
i said she could sleep in my bed and she goes "iiiiiiii warned you. iiiiim a cuddlerrrrrr!" slightly regretting this..
Second night back. Go to house party and played ring of fire. Me plus five other people completely naked. College wins.. It's going to be a long semester
My catholic guilt is strong, but the alcohol is stronger.
There's a dead squirrel in the freezer. Is that what you stopped to get out of the road last night?
I'm sitting outside your room listening for sex noises eating pepperoni...slowly
All I remember from the concert was leaving in an RV full of middle aged people playing circle of death
We got signed out of jail by an Uber driver. I think that qualifies as a great first night of college
shit i just threw up on a freshman
i don't know if i should laugh or feel bad..
nevermind it was a sophmore, laugh.
No I’m scared man. She sharted. In my car. Wearing a dress. And I still like her.
Wow
Randomize
